Guest House

Since you’ll be getting in so late I will just leave the keys for you under the front mat. Please, stop by tomorrow and say hello. We would love to meet you.

Jesus Christ, where the fuck is this driveway?! I can’t get very good service, do you? I just don’t understand, we are on the same plan. How do you have 4G and mine is E? Do you see it? Oh! I think this is it. There is a cabin with a light on. There are no cars here so I assume this is ours.

Do you see the keys? Oh my god, this snow is so deep! A-HA! I feel like I’m sinking. I can’t wait to see this in the morning. Oh, it’s sort of creepy here but my god the stars are beautiful.

No, I only know a few constellations. My dad is sort of an amateur astronomer. He’s got one of those telescopes that looks like a cannon. He drives to South Carolina sometimes to really see the stars. Oh yeah, see that’s Orion’s belt. And, there’s Taurus. God it’s cold out here – my nose feels like it could break off. I’m going inside. A-HA! My jeans are covered!

Oh it’s so cool! Look, it has a little weird loft space! Do you think this is all real wood? Good, there are pans oh and salt and pepper. Lets unload the car and food now even though I’m pretty sure outside is colder than this fridge! Ew, what is that? I wonder how old that is. Don’t eat that – it’s not ours. Haha I don’t want you dying of food poisoning or something. I’m not sure I have enough cell service to call the ambulance. Yeah! They won’t find us here either! Damn guest house. Oh my god, this bed is so squeaky! Thankfully our neighbors aren’t close by. Where is the plug, my phone is almost dead trying to search for signal. It’s so warm in here. Lets live here forever.

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